Have you ever wondered if it really is possible to have it all? To have the beautiful family and the flourishing business?
Most importantly, can you really have it all and achieve it without feeling overwhelmed with guilt about the time you spend working hard on your career and not with the people you love most? Your children.
I definitely believe that you can create a life for yourself that encompasses all your passions, from parenting and beyond. But, doing so guilt-free is trickier.
After all, we know our children are our world – so shouldn’t they be enough?
If you’re dealing with pangs of guilt at the thought of trying to be the best you can be in all areas of your life, here’s how you can overcome them:
Remember your ‘why’
The foundation for dealing with any guilt you have spending time on your business, is to seriously consider ‘why’ you set out in business in the first place. It’s unlikely the only reason you are determined to succeed is for your own ego.
Typically we desire to make a living for our families. And beyond paying the bills we wish for the financial freedom to live fulfilling lives alongside our children. For them to be able to experience the best in life; education, health care, travel. It’s easy to forget this when we’re wrapped up in admin instead of playing imaginary tea parties.
Or perhaps you feel you are called to help other people in your life? To make an impact on those who are lacking in whatever area it may be – this is a legitimate and powerful reason to spend time on your business, and will ultimately only set a positive example to your children.
TIP: Write down your ‘why’ and have it somewhere you can access it while at work. Bring it out as a reminder any time you lose sight of why you are working so hard when you could be focusing on your children.
Be easier on yourself
The next step is to make a conscious effort to stop being so hard on yourself! With your ‘why’ defined this does become easier, but you will still need to stop and forgive yourself when you feel like an awful parent occasionally.
Be kind to yourself in both respects; if you really feel you need to do more work – do it. But if you feel that you need to spend more time with your family, and it’s possible to do it, do it.
Putting yourself off schedule to reconnect can sometimes be what you need to get back to full productivity.
TIP: Make a concerted effort to stop and validate your emotions when you are feeling guilty about spending time on your business. Say “This is natural, but I have good intentions and this is what I need to do to realise my vision for my family”.
Use your time wisely
Wasting your precious childcare time on tasks that get you nowhere is a recipe for guilt and demotivation. Make sure you use your business-focussed time wisely by scheduling and planning to the tee!
Make to-do lists based on priority and break up daunting large tasks into smaller chunks so you feel more inclined to make a start. How many of us have ‘to-do’ items that have been listed for months?
TIP: Make sure you never start your work sessions without a clear list of objectives to achieve during your allotted time slot.
Follow your passions
I mentioned that the important reasons behind starting a business are typically centred on other people. But don’t underestimate the importance of doing something for YOU. Think about what you want for your own children. Do you want them to follow their dreams and go after what they want in life?
If so, set an example by following your heart and spending time on things that are important to you. When you follow your passions in business, at least you will find the time you are at work to be more enjoyable too.
TIP: Not sure you’re using your passions in business? Make a list of everything in life that gets you excited and think about how you could infuse elements into your work. Doesn’t seem possible? Maybe it’s time for a new career direction!
Saskia Gregory is a success coach for modern mothers. Helping women build beautiful & inspiring online businesses which provide a lifestyle of fulfilment, freedom, and fun.
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